My Gramps got diagnosed with cancer last December and I offered to help him through treatments. He did really well and is now cancer-free, but now he lives with me and its obvious he is in no state to live alone. After 8 months of caring for him, spending all my time with him, not feeling like I can get away for the weekend because he needs care, etc. I am CERTAIN I want to be CF. I’m 36, the oldest of 5 children and I have always been a caretaker. But this last 8 months was just too much for me. I realize now that I’ve never just done what I wanted to do. If I have kids I will just be stuck forever taking care of others. Now I just have to find a way to get my grandfather care elsewhere. I feel like an asshole, but I just cant do this.
Edit: the literal moment after I posted this, my gramps came in to tell me that he had diarrhea in my bathroom – but that it’s okay now because we washed his underwear in the sink and cleaned up the floor. God help me.